Monday, July 27, 2009

Top 5 M/F Stories of the Month - July 09

Oh, hello...didn't see you there. You stopped in at the right time. It's getting to the end of the month again and you know what that means. It's time for another edition of The Dick and Bo Show's Top 5 M/F Stories of the Month!!! Ok, ok. Sit back, relax, and enjoy wasting some precious time.

Number 5

Three days!?!

I was under the impression that the NFL Draft lasted for months. Apparently, it's just the incredible amount of media coverage and speculation that makes the draft seem that way. The article points out that it was expanded from two days. I would've bet money that it lasted from right after the Super Bowl until sometime in April.

Obviously, this is a shameless ploy by the NFL for more advertising dollars. The draft, at least the first round or two, already had the attention of most football fans. It's exciting to see who your team is going to get.

Anyway, this article isn't really worth a read because they could tell football fans the week before the draft that it's going to take place on Thursday night and people would still tune in. Unless, of course, it's like the MLB All-Star game and people realize that they have better things to do during the week. Do you really care that it's expanding to three days? Didn't think so.

Number 4

No, I swear. Promise. I didn't do it. I met a girl. Pamela, I think. She was covered in it. I kissed her anyway. I know. Stupid decision. I didn't really think she was covered in that! Ah, tennis players. What'll they think of next?

Here is the reason that this story is a M/Fer:

Richard who? It's men's tennis. If it's not Rafel Nadal or Roger Federer who cares.

Number 3

In a recent autobiography Michael Phelps...wait no...Josh Howard...hang on...Allen Iverson...no, no, he's not the one...ah, yes, Lebron James admitted to using marijuana. Once. In high school. So that is supposed to get me read the rest of this article and buy the book? Come on. Tell me about how he never went to class or made $50,000 a year for going to school there. Don't tell me something that a lot of high school kids do. What a waste!

Number 2

If Pete Carroll is coaching the opposition I'd be worried for Notre Dame. I don't know if this story is out there because no one wants to talk about how bad the actual team at Notre Dame is or if there really are that many fans who want to hear about how a bunch of old guys are going to pull some muscles trying to beat up a bunch of Japanese football players. Really, ESPN? This is the kind of story that you run for us. There wasn't anything else going on? Nothing? Stop insulting our intelligence, please!

Number 1

Well we've reached the apex. This is it! Hold on everybody!! Here it is. Yep, that's right. Tim Tebow is a virgin. This story is such a waste of time that I don't even know what to write about it. On one hand, I don't care about this at all and on the other hand I don't care about this at all. Is this really what we've come to? Wow. That's all I can say.

There you have it folks. Thanks for stopping by. I hope you enjoyed another edition of The Dick and Bo Show's Top 5 M/F Stories of the Month of July.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

Journalizm Police - 7-07-09


Breaking news: ESPN's own Chris Broussard, in an obvious effort to get face time on the mothership, reported this morning that NBA superstar Lebron James told fellow player Trevor Ariza he was going to stay in Cleveland after his contract expires in 2010. Supposedly, BronBron told Trevor this information in a futile attempt to lure the free agent to join him and Shaq Diesel for their much-anticipated 2009 title run. I'd link to the article/5 minute wankfest of a video but...

Oh wait, no, no, Lebron didn't tell Trevor anything. And guess who's around to tell us about it? Mr. Chris Broussard!

Well done, Chris Broussard, you slave to the 24-hr news cycle, you'd probably quote some puke head friend of yours from middle school now on Facebook as a "confidential source with inside knowledge of the NBA as it pertends to Lebron James" just to get your mug on the air. You sir, for your failure to check sources, are under arrest by the JOURNALIZM POLICE.